Bring It On

     So I haven't had a lot of time from the diagnosis of this thing until now to feel truly scared.  I was scared right after the ENT told me I had a huge mass in my lung.  And the next day when the surgeon said "tumor" for the first time.  And when I decided to "read up on" various types of lung cancer.  But then we dove right into the deep end of testing and consults and hospital and procedures, and it hasn't left a lot of time to feel any one particular way about this situation for very long.
    However, knowing that I am willingly going to allow someone to spend 5+ hours dripping straight-up poison into me--actually hoping the insurance will come through and let this happen on schedule--well, now, that just plain scares the bejeezus out of me.  Because I know that if I am willing to let that happen, then this is some serious shit.
   I've been feeling like I'm a tiny Bilbo Baggins gearing up to take on the ginormous and terrible Smaug; to say I've been feeling daunted about the whole thing would be an understatement.  But then I realized I've been focused on the right visual all along--I've just been looking at it the wrong way.  Because who says I have to be a Hobbit?

     I can be the dragon.